Take the time to remember why your’re with them

Hear Everything | November 01 2013

Life gets so busy it can seem like we forget to breathe sometimes. We get stuck in the rut of going about our daily life without even realizing what’s happening. We get up in the morning with a long list of to-dos and schedules, and sometimes I am sure it feels like we don’t stop until our heads hit the pillow.
So much of our society focuses on tomorrow that we spend very little time even remembering why we are doing the things we are doing. The roles we play in life when we work, as parents, and in relationships
all create a full life, and sometimes I truly believe we let that full life take over. When life is in control of us instead of us being in control of our lives it is easy to forget the little things and the important things. Remember when you first met your significant other? I am guessing that life might have seemed simpler then, but was it really? Maybe some of the roles in your life now hadn’t come into play
yet, like being the soccer mom or the hockey dad, and there wasn’t as much on your plate. Or maybe, it was easier to remember to take the time and make the time to have special moments together and focus on why you were and are with your significant other, to realize that you chose to be with that person because of how much they mean to you and how much you both add to each other’s life. Why was it easier?

I remember something my fabulous grandmother used to say to me: “We teach others how to treat us.” (I am sure she got it from watching Dr. Phil, but I still think it is powerful.)
She said that to me at a time in my life that I really needed to hear it, and now and then her voice
pops into my head with those exact words.

Maybe because you remembered that to create a special and healthy relationship you needed to make your partner an important and significant part of your life on a regular basis. I look back on the early days of my relationship and realize just how easy it has been at times to let life get so busy that I almost forgot how much I love to hear my husband laugh. Or how much I enjoy hearing him talk about something I might have absolutely no interest in personally because of how passionate he is about the things he enjoys. Remembering what it was that drew us together in the first place reminds me of how amazing a
relationship can be when we slow down and focus on how we can fortify and strengthen the relationships
we are in on a daily basis. I remember something my fabulous grandmother used to say to me: “We teach others how to treat us.” (I am sure she got it from watching Dr. Phil, but I still think it is powerful.)
She said that to me at a time in my life that I really needed to hear it, and now and then her voice
pops into my head with those exact words. I know that I have been guilty of complaining that my husband wasn’t spending enough ‘quality’ time with me, but when I look at the situation objectively I know that I
wasn’t making as much time for him as I could have either. So if there are things we look at in our relationships and say “I miss when we…” or “I remember when we used to spend time …” we can stop, take measure, and decide how we are going to teach the people in our lives how to treat us. If we really miss something that stands out as having been integral to the bond we have with our partner then we need to be the ones to take the first move and make the effort to incorporate it into our life again, even if it means that the schedule needs to be tweaked and some wiggle-room needs to be created. Remember, good
relationships don’t just happen; they take time, patience, and two people who truly want to work to
be together. A good relationship reflects that each partner takes the time to think about the things that their significant other is and does that makes them feel like they have caught the end of a shooting star.